Oh yeah! It's Time to Talk about Sex Again

June 7, 2009 - 9:02 PM

Well! Thank goodness I have found the love of my life and do not have to worry about the dating arena, which inevitably includes the sex arena. Many people choose not to have sex, which is respectable, but for those who are comfortable exploring sex, spring term has been a time rife with opportunities to test the waters.

One of my close friends comes to me about every other week with a new notch in her lipstick case, which I completely support as long as she still feels good about herself. But part of me thinks that she doesn't really feel good when it comes down to the truth. Although she never discusses it, her weight seems to be quite a concern, if not for her psyche, then for her health. But she never says a word regarding her weight, and on the off chance that she does, she says that she is "just a bigger girl." However, it has been my experience as a bigger girl that no one really reconciles the fact that they are overweight. When I think about being a bigger girl, I remember how willing I was to go the distance just to secure the attention of a guy for 10 minutes (or less).

Now, my other friend has had an entirely different experience. She is gorgeous, smart, ambitious, extremely fun, and extraordinarily kind. She is a great girl and would be a phenomenal catch for the right guy. But lately she has been exploring her sexual inclinations in less constrained ways than she has ever done before. She just left her boyfriend of 4 years, with whom she had monogamous sex, but now that she is single, she has been enjoying the pleasures that coincide.

The other night, she met up with a guy who she had been seeing a few weeks ago-but it didn't work out at the time. On Friday night, my friend and her date went dancing. Because of her vibrant personality and talent, she is a great dancer and has the time of her life every time she gets on a dance floor. As a matter of fact, she creates a dance floor wherever she goes-I've seen it!

Needless to say, the night progressed and my friend found herself back in her date's apartment. Throughout the night, she found herself shocked by the maneuvers her date was pulling. She had never seen, and I had never heard of, such disgraceful bedroom manners. It was like the poor, pathetic, and probably inexperienced boy picked up all of his tricks from what he could download for free on the internet. I would only write about this if it was important.

It seemed to me that this boy, not a man, was so insecure about himself that he used the most controlling, domineering, and cliché sexual acts he could muster that he gave males a bad name. It disgusts me that men who belittle women get away with such things. It is really too bad. There are so many men out there who treat women well. Sometimes they have good personalities and are not as dashingly handsome as other men, but I have found that many men who consider themselves gorgeous also consider themselves entitled to whatever behavior they wish to engage in at any given moment.

Luckily, my friend was able to come to terms with the fact that she went home with the wrong kind of guy. She does not regret the choice to have sex, only the choice to have sex with that loser. Because she is so level-headed, she is determined to use this experience as an opportunity to take a different kind of guy to the pillow-top next time she gets the chance-which may be very soon!