New Thanksgiving Memories

Lynae N.

November 29, 2009 - 9:42 PM

Four years ago I went to my mother-in-law's house for Thanksgiving. It was my first experience spending a holiday with my husband's family and it was my first experience with holiday awkwardness. I've always heard the stories about the Turkey through the window and the drunk uncle who makes everyone's life miserable. Silly me, until this experience four years ago I thought these stories were just that, stories.

After my experience four years ago my husband and I decided to have Thanksgiving at our house and break the family up a bit to save on some of the tension. This worked well for a couple years but there is something about having Thanksgiving at mom's that Brian's brother and sister began to miss. So this Thanksgiving we went back down to his mom's house.

Neither of us knew what to expect and I was a bit nervous and on edge the entire trip down that something somehow would go terribly wrong. I was so relieved when all of the brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, and grandparents played well together. This is amazing considering how many people were packed into a tiny house in the middle of Rogue River, Oregon. There truly was no escape and in the colliding waves of relationship dynamics there certainly could have been an explosion.

It was fascinating to watch everyone interact. Being a bit more removed, I enjoyed sitting back and watching my family play out emotions and under currents of past enjoyment, issues, and regrets in such a concentrated space. I learned more about family and relationships in this one day than in a whole year of classes and I feel that I now know some of my family members that I hadn't known before.

And we made it through Thanksgiving! I remember Brian and I commenting how impressed we were that we didn't have any crazy stories to tell and the relief we experienced as a result. Well, we spoke to soon. I got my awkward holiday story the next morning.

I woke up late and didn't have time to take a shower at my sister-in-law's house with the three other adults and five kids all competing for bathing time. I decided to pull my hair up in a quick pony-tail and not mess with trying to bid for a rushed, cold five-minute shower. So I walked out into the living room with my arms full of bags ready to pack back in the car for the ride home. My brother-in-law was in the living room and is notorious for pulling on pony-tails. I bent down and dropped my giant load of bags and stood back up, immediately I felt someone pulling on my hair. It was my brother-in-law, he was laughing and reached around to give me a good-natured hug. I guess he was feeling a little too good natured and I was shocked and didn't know how to respond when his hand slid down my back and rested on my derrière. I felt stunned and didn't know what to say so I didn't say anything at all. 

I talked this over with my husband later as we were leaving town after breakfast at my father-in-law's house. We decided that there is the benefit of the doubt and perhaps it was a mistake. If it happens again I have resolved to gently call him out on it and correct the issue. But for now, I like to think it was a mistake and I have learned my lesson to not celebrate an awkward moment free holiday with Brian's family until we are officially in the car and headed home.