Reflection

Leah S.

November 19, 2009 - 7:59 AM

Yes, that time stamp is correct. I am up early for a meeting and had some time to blog real fast. I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. Mostly reflecting; thinking about the past and my part in it or how I felt at certain times. One thing I have noticed is that relationships have changed. It seems in college a boyfriend is either someone you can just have some fun with right now without being super serious or one person in the couple is looking long term, like marriage. It's weird to think that I could be married in the next five or six years. Relationships with family change too. They see you as an adult now and they treat you that way. It feels nice, but there are definitely times I miss being treated like a kid (I guess most of us still get that treatment when we are sick). The relationships between friends change too. You keep in contact with some old ones and lose contact with others. You feel kind of sad that you don't talk to certain people anymore, but it's not a strong enough feeling to go out of your way to change things. I guess it is mostly because they are also doing nothing to make sure you keep in contact.

I know last year there was a group of girls I hung out with quite a bit. Two live on the floor above me, one lives on the same floor around the corner, and the other two live in an apartment off campus. I see one of them at NSCS meetings and she says hi whenever she comes to visit everyone, but there is no real friendship there. The girl who lives around the corner was a good friend last year. This year we hardly talk. It's both our faults, but it doesn't bother us (although I can't speak for her, I'm sure she feels the same way). We talk occasionally and sometimes go get food together. Our conversations are not what they were like last year though. I'm not bothered by that. I feel like I should be, but I'm really not.

I think the thing is, is that we start to realize what we want out of a relationship and we find people that we can get that from. The relationships I'm forming now are very special to me and I know in the future would do anything to keep in contact with them and stay good friends with them. It gets harder to find good friends and easier to find acquaintances. That is not a bad thing; you just have to look harder for good friends. These relationships I have now are shaping me into the person I one day will become and I realize that now so I surround myself with people who are helping me become the best person I can be.

Well meeting is getting closer and I still have to finish getting ready. So until next time...