Fixing a Bad Day

Korrin B.

November 17, 2008 - 9:08 PM

Monday, November 17, 2008 - the day of my collapse. Nineteen credits in one term are too many. I had a midterm in my ancient Greek class the next day, work and meetings taking up the time in my day to study, and one thousand other things my mind was dwelling on. I woke up late for class and with a headache. I attempted to rally to catch the next bus to campus, but instead ended up an emotional wreck on my bedroom floor. Sobbing, I called my mom for consolation. She stuck with me through grumpy fits, crying disappointment, and angst-ridden stress until I was back to slight stability. I decided to take the day off. Although I had a million reasons why I needed to go to school and work, I could tell that what I really needed to do was nurture myself. This process would prove to be important, in turn helping me with work and school.

Step one to regaining my inner strength - hot tea. I could feel a scratch in my throat hinting at my future cold, so I made a cup of lemon honey tea. I went back into my room with my cup in hand and opened up all of my windows. Everything in my core being felt like it was shattering. I felt like I was never going to get everything I needed to get done finished. However, as natural light and fresh air gleamed into my room, I found a calming comfort in the warmth of my cup.

I couldn't dwell in pity all day in my pajamas, under my comforter. Therefore, step two was getting up, showering, and getting dressed. Shampoo, conditioner, and mango-scented body wash later, I felt refreshed and awake though apprehension still lingered in my mind. I dressed in comfortable clothes. Today wasn't about high-fashion heels or form-fitting v-neck shirts. Today was about being comfortable and learning how to make myself feel good amongst the chaos.

I wasn't ready to try and study quite yet. I needed more time to relax my mind, to not have to think. Despite the rainy, cold days that had preceded this malicious Monday, I noticed that this day was sunny and surprisingly warm. In an effort to soak in some vitamin D and let this break in the storm try and heal me, I grabbed my helmet and my journal and headed for my bike.

I believe that the neighborhood park is the evidence that community still exists amongst all the chaos. It shows that we are a social people who can come together to rebuild strength. I biked out to Friendly Park and sat down at a picnic table so that I could journal. The bike ride had been great. It got my blood flowing and my endorphins pumping. I may not ride my bike all the time, but when I do, it was worth every penny. As I looked around the park, I felt a sense of home. Children ran around the playground as their parents conversed with each other. Dogs barked and chased after insects flying by. I was out of the dungeon that my house had become and in a sanctuary of light. When I did finally get home, I was ready to start over and, more importantly, I knew I could.

College years are an incredible time in one's life. However, they can become overwhelming as well. One of the most important things to do while busy being busy in college is to remember to stop and take care of you. Like I found out on Monday, you can cram all of the facts and information you want into your brain, but if you don't take the time to stop and nurture your core self, you are bound to crumble. Monday was my collapse, but also the construction of my stronger foundation. It is the little things, whether it is tea, a hot shower, or a bike ride to a park, which glue the rest of it together.